Joke of the week from my OH

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Bid
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Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Bid » 20 Jul 2008, 15:35

My OH teaches Pilates for a living, and he likes to liven up the relaxation part of his classes with a joke of the week (how that is in any way relaxing I don't know :roll: ). A lot of his clients are elderly, so they have to be clean jokes just in case he offends anyone, so if anyone knows any that are suitable do let us know!

This is the joke for the coming week ....

A man goes to his doctor saying "I'm very worried Doctor, I can't seem to help myself - I keep having this urge to deliver babies!

The doctor shakes his head, looks very concerned and replies. "Oh dear, it sounds to me like you are having a Midwife Crisis" :lol: :lol:
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c123
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by c123 » 20 Jul 2008, 15:53

what do you call a deer with no eyes?

i've no idea!
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Ali Cat
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Ali Cat » 20 Jul 2008, 17:49

c123 wrote:what do you call a deer with no eyes?

i've no idea!
What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?

Still no idea!

:lol:
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Murphy's mum
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Murphy's mum » 20 Jul 2008, 22:05

why do elephants paint their toe nails red?

so they can hide in cherry trees!

have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?

effective isn't it!!!!!

Chris :mrgreen:

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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Ali Cat » 21 Jul 2008, 07:57

How many elephants can you get in a mini?

4 - 2 in the front and 2 in the back

How many giraffes can you get in the mini?

None - its full of elephaints
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by vickiD » 21 Jul 2008, 08:16

why are there no asprins in the jungle? cause the parrots eat em all (paracetomal geddit!!! haha)

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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Bid » 21 Jul 2008, 08:47

It won't be the exercises making his clients groan - it will be the jokes :lol: Keep em coming!
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Ali Cat
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Ali Cat » 21 Jul 2008, 09:16

What do you call a man with

a spade on his head
Doug

a rabbit on his head
Warren

a seagull on his head
Cliff (or George)

with bananas in his ears
anything you like - he can't hear you

an area with trees, ponds, waterfalls and flowers
- nothing, thats just a beauty spot
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Laughter is the best medicine – unless you’re diabetic, then insulin comes pretty high on the list

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Bid
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Bid » 21 Jul 2008, 09:44

... a man with no arms or legs in a swimming pool?

Bob!
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Ali Cat
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Ali Cat » 21 Jul 2008, 09:45

a woman with slates on her head

Ruth
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Ali Cat
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Ali Cat » 23 Jul 2008, 10:02

Just heard this one

Why do elephants have big ears?

Coz Noddy wouldn't pay the ransom!!
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Pauline » 26 Jul 2008, 13:40

Have you heard the one about the constipated alcholic?



He couldn't pass the pub!
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by Butterfly » 28 Jul 2008, 09:07

:lol: :roll: :lol: :roll: :lol: :roll: great!
two cows in a field.....one says "Mooo!"
The other says!......"I was going to say that!" :roll:
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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by amber » 29 Jul 2008, 16:49

Bid wrote:It won't be the exercises making his clients groan - it will be the jokes :lol: Keep em coming!
Tee Hee!!!! :lol:

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Re: Joke of the week from my OH

Post by aitch » 31 Jul 2008, 18:51

two snowmen in a garden one says to the other can you smell carrots ?

what do you call a chinese woman with a food processor on her head?
Blenda.:D
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